ken wilson online

A thick skin and a tender heart, that’s what you need if you’re serious about the pastor business. The thick skin will come with time and criticism. Either that, or you’ll find a different line of work. But the tender heart, oh my, that’s the one to pay attention to. I’m afraid that my deepest regrets in pastoring have to do with that. Especially in this environment where faithfulness to God is viewed through the false lens of “liberal vs. conservative.” Under this rubric the liberals are the moral softies, which means the conservatives are the hard-nosed (or posteriored) ones. But take a lesson from Billy Graham.

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I like talking to young pastors because I feel no need to dance around and be overly pastoral.  I can be blunt, because there’s too much at stake not to be. There are too many pastors I’ve known who haven’t faced things head on, haven’t had someone talking blunt to them.   For example seminaries will take your money, but how often does anyone say, “You can come out of seminary THOUSANDS of dollars in debt.  Have you thought about what impact that will have on your capacity to serve in a church?”   But that’s not what this post is about. This one’s about a little agreement every pastor should have with his/her spouse or if single, a trusted friend. Read the rest of this entry »

Advice to young pastors (or what I wish I would have heard when I was one; or advice I wish I would have listened to!): many pastors I know (myself included) were drawn to the job by the prospect of speaking–thinking we might be good at it, wanting to do it. Pastors do like the sound of their own voice. Much of the training and mentoring that pastors receive has to do with doing it well. And the leading part of pastoring does require learning to be assertive. So those drawn to the job are often those comfortable asserting themselves. I hope so at least, because leading does require asserting. But, and it’s a big one: Read the rest of this entry »

To be a pastor requires the willingness to do your biblical studies and your theology down in the mud from which humanity arose and in which we continue to live and move and have our being. You think your job as a pastor is to apply biblical truth to people at a safe remove? Think again. Your job as a pastor is to be willing to come alongside real people having real struggles. Sometimes the people are like you and their struggles like your own. Sometimes they are unlike you–they and their struggles that is. And your job is to know them in their struggles as if they were your own. Read the rest of this entry »

After a long bout with depression and cynicism, my father (many years ago) got himself turned around and toward God. He spent a time of personal recovery hanging out with my imprint pastor Dick Bieber at Messiah Lutheran Church in Detroit (they are no longer Lutheran, however.) Dick took my dad to a meeting of local pastors, who were doing what pastors are want to do when they gather in professional circles, that is to say piss and moan about their congregations–how they don’t get it, etc. My father, a Christian newbie, took them to task: “Why don’t you stop pretending you’re set-apart- from-the-flock professionals, and go home and actually join your churches, instead of treating them like a bunch of dissatisfied employees. I thought Jesus was looking for shepherds, not hirelings.” An awkward moment ensued. Read the rest of this entry »

I am amazed to meet so many young or aspiring pastors [or staff members of para-church organizations like Young Life, Inter-Varsity, Campus Crusade, or those involved in exploring international missions through YWAM or other organizations] who don’t have, know, or connect with a trusted advisor-pastor. Someone who knows them, cares about them, and has their long term interests at heart. And maybe as important, someone who has earned their trust. Read the rest of this entry »

So you wanna be a pastor? Get a paying job first. First figure out how to make money apart from the church. Get a business degree, for example. Or some other degree that allows you to profitably enter the workplace after four years of college. Not a religious studies degree which prepares you to study religion, which you can do on our own time anyway. (While you’re working, get out of debt. Do not pass go until you’ve gotten yourself out of the debt jail.) Then seminary or whatever pastor training you like. Having figured out how to make money, hold onto your money making capacity for as long as you can, should you go to work in a church. I kept my R.N. license alive as long as I could, before letting it lapse.

What does this do for you? It gives you some important internal freedom. You don’t have to work for the church in order to make a living. If you’re married it helps your marriage. Your spouse knows that if push comes to shove you can leave your church employment. In the event it’s killing you or your marriage or your family. If you spouse doesn’t know this, the church can become a rival lover. Not good for the marriage. And it gives you experience. You’ll be calling people to commit time and money to the church enterprise. How can you do that if you haven’t done it? You who are paid to be a Christian.

Whatever you do: don’t go to college, accumulating, what, 24K in debt (the average, I’ve heard) followed by seminary (which is outlandishly expensive) which prepares you to work in a church at an entry level that doesn’t pay all that well, if you haven’t noticed. Saddled, is how you will feel and I would spare you that. So face the money demon and tame it. Figure out how you can make it, apart from the church. Then you’ll be free to serve the Lord in the employ of the church.