ken wilson online

Advice to young pastors (or what I wish I would have heard when I was one; or advice I wish I would have listened to!): many pastors I know (myself included) were drawn to the job by the prospect of speaking–thinking we might be good at it, wanting to do it. Pastors do like the sound of their own voice. Much of the training and mentoring that pastors receive has to do with doing it well. And the leading part of pastoring does require learning to be assertive. So those drawn to the job are often those comfortable asserting themselves. I hope so at least, because leading does require asserting. But, and it’s a big one:

…Listening is important too. Listening is important in personal relationships, for example. (I know: brilliant observation!) Listening is important to God, as in, he wants us to listen well (to him, for starters.) I wish I had learned to listen better when I was a younger pastor. Oh, man, too many times I was crafting my own response to someone sitting in my office while they were pouring out their thoughts, insuring that I my response wouldn’t be informed by them.

The thing that helped me most in the listening department (besides having people insist I listen to them, like my wife and other dear ones–thanks, I needed that)….where was I? The thing that helped me most in the listening department was taking a course in spiritual direction, which is all about listening well. And having a spiritual director (which I do) who listens well (which he does.) And  learning….to……slow…… ………down. Trusting enough to slow down. Expecting that the God activity will more likely be discerned in the listening rather than in the crafting of one’s own thoughts.

It takes effort. It takes learning to be still and silent before God, for starters–a spiritual discipline that only comes with time and practice for most people. And then it takes trusting that the person speaking has something worth saying; that God speaks through others often. Well, that’s just scratching the surface. It’s an art is what it is, and you learn it, not so much in seminary, as in a course in spiritual direction.Which is what I wish I’d taken much earlier in my pastoring, a course in spiritual direction that is. Here’s a good one, led by Dave Nixon, someone I know and respect…

This entry was posted on Friday, February 8th, 2008 at 1:11 pm and is filed under advice to young pastors. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.